Diary of an undergraduate

   It’s dusk. not dark yet, early evening around five, six and it is threatening rain. We are seated third floor on the veranda of the ugly hostel. The roof which gleamed white 
in a very far away past, housing generations upon generations of students now dirty brown with rust and thick layers of dust with mismatched paint on the walls. pealed white paint over lapping yellow blue pink green  coatings which students have repainted over the years, given it the look of a kindergartens color book. The hostel gate doesn’t even have a signpost probably kicked away years ago and the only significant land mark were the clothes strewn everywhere; in the grass, clothe line, corridors, door way, windows.  If you take a stroll down that road you won’t miss it.  Standing a little off, a massive building decorated with clothing.  I call it the artist joke, or an inside out rainbow.

       Three of us on  short plastic stools we liked to call our joko a poor imitation of the Yoruba traditional kitchen  stool, except  Blessing who spread her legs on a mat, wrapper tucked in between her thighs are stooping  sorting the beans we intended to boil overnight and finish the next morning. Class ended an hour ago and the heat drove us out of our rooms so we converged in front of my dormot catching what little breeze there was and supplementing it by fanning ourselves with the edge of our wrapper, careful not to show too much skin. It neared the time when the boys came in and we had to guard our bride price jealously. We picked at the beans in silence praying for the rain to really fall with wind and not just tease us with a few drops…Benin weather is pure winchy…this minute you are very sure that you would collapse from the heat wave when it begins to pour so sudden and so heavy and the clothes on the line get soaked even before we climb down our story building to rescue em.…

        Blessing cursed as she swatted at the flies and continued ad-libing to solid star and tiwa savage’s baby jollof, Occasionally swaying her body in rhythm..  I found it amusing that she never knew the complete weddings of any song her favorites including. Blessings style was she loved them she played them and she chewed her mouth along with the artist and felt on top of the world not one song she could really sing even if she played it a thousand and plus one time and  she didn’t care that we made fun of her. like now.

        
 Adam is in the hostel oooo,

 A stocky girl with deep voice sounded the alarm.

 Man they hostel make una carry una big bombom enter room, and your flat chest hide am…or your husband no go pay bride price.

I adjusted my wrapper firmly against my chest to ensure it doesn’t slip and other girls did same those, who were easing themselves hurriedly finished cleaned up and walked away but one particular girl wasn’t fast enough. Before she had time to tuck her butt back into her clothing a boy had turned the corner and spotted her. We howled in delight Anita clapping her hands excitedly ‘her bride price have reduce.’  A few girls ran to the edge of the verandah to watch but the boy stopped at the end of the curve undecided if he should go back for a little while or just continue. He turned back to allow the girl run for cover where her roommates waited at the door to shelter her.  

She would be so embarrassed

 blessing concluded as she dropped clean beans into the designated bowl and dipped her hands for more… this is beans dirty sha.. that woman nor try she sell three cups of dirty and two cups of beans make persin chop..

anita interrupted her,

 she wont be embarrassed at least it’s not a boy she knows and he didn’t even see her face…

who told you that one?  he saw her jare blessing argued.

Ehn but it really isn’t that embarrassing compared to….Who remembers the day the v.c walked in on a naked girl bathing outside? Blessing asked.

 I laughed I remembered that one blessing did and there was no argument that it was  super embarrassing for the girl.

 Did you see her face? I asked

 Anita the dramatist gave us a vivid display of the shock on the girls face when she noticed the man had brought out his phone to take a picture.

“ she was like whadda….?  She won’t forget that day in her life. Am not sure I will know the girl again if I see her sha… this school ehn all manner of nonsence is gotten away with… how can a grandfather do such a thing??’

 I smiled as I recalled that day in my mind’s eye… it was very funny. It was the usual morning. Girls bathing outside early, before the porters would make their usual rounds. The punishment was strict for those caught not using the bathroom.. yet we always chose to risk it. Bathing outside was better than sharing a very very dirty small enclosure{ no matter how the cleaners washed it still never came out neat} with centipedes and other slinking stuff.. People bathed and ran back in this girl was bathing by the tap obviously enjoying the water because she kept sponging over again and she had her eyes closed humming when all of sudden and without warning the V.C and his entourage walked in in self proclaimed inspection of the girls hostel.. nobody could save the girl those of us outside stood there transfixed we could not even shout. The usual bell announcing mens entrance at an usual time was not even rung by the porters.

And the V.C obviously overjoyed at the free gift of nature brought out his phone to take shots.

What is your most embarrassing moment Ebose? Anita turned to me

 I smiled “ I won’t tell you. Not even for a million abeg… you people won’t let me here the end of the matter”
    they both looked at me with hungry eyes while I chewed my little finger and the rain came down in pellets.